06/29/16

Peace is Boring

We are entering the golden age and the middle ground is beginning to fade. People are either consciously responsible for their reality, they are empowered, or they are living unaware while lost in their fears, not empowered. Duality becomes more defined while both light and shadow become more defined.

With this shift in consciousness, those of us on the healer’s path dedicate our days to find inner peace. We are remembering how to view life from our higher self’s perspective, to understand the ultimate irrelevance of all events. No matter what occurs in our personal life or in the collective world, we can always connect with peace. The ability to access peace is an essential skill for experiencing fulfillment. Yet, as with anything, there is a balance to maintain. Healers often obsess over peace while neglecting the worth of our primal nature. We are both our divine higher self and our flawed human identity, constantly striving for serenity robs us of the value and beauty in dramatic chaos. Sometimes it’s in our truth to embrace distress or behave like an obnoxious asshole. Suffering can deepen and strengthen our relationships, acting inappropriately may be the catalyst required to undergo transformation. Nature, for instance, demonstrates the inevitable changing seasons, she knows stagnation is boring and dissatisfying. While peace is necessary for experiencing fulfillment, it can also hinder our human experience. It’s an amazing feat to master the mind and emotions. Halting our energetic tornado while centering in calmness is an ability which greatly serves us. However, it is equally important to embrace every aspect of our personality as each trait serves a purpose on our journey. Instead of analyzing the energy of every thought and emotion, give yourself the freedom to experience amusement. Let yourself be in the mayhem and trust your intuition to call you out when you are sincerely acting against your truth. Allow yourself to be absurd and uncontrolled because the divine foundation you’ve worked so hard to establish won’t disappear, nor will it crack. It will only strengthen.
06/14/15

Hawaii Thus Far

– An impactful death, bewildering reunion with an old classmate, being homeless, becoming a live-in spiritual guide, an unforgettable romance, six month isolation, 17 day water fast, hitting financial rock bottom, family healing, a new luxurious beginning. These stories are my island highlights for the last twelve months. –

Starting off at June 1st, 2014 – Joanne’s return to spirit

Jo and I

In the days surrounding Jo’s passing, I felt steady waterfalls of light pouring through me. I had never felt such power at that magnitude. As tired and emotional as I was, I also felt invincible with an unbelievable clarity of what to do, exactly when to do it. I was calling in angels non-stop so the house was flooded in their vibration. In the days prior to Jo’s transition, I couldn’t talk her through such changes as her mind was lost in other realities, suffering with dementia. I had to approach her on a purely energetic level with these mental restrictions. The only way I can describe the days leading up to her death and the few days following was similar to that of a mild LSD trip. Everything was heightened in the cosmic world unlike shrooms where the focus is more of the body and physical reality. That feeling made perfect sense since thats exactly what I was doing by strengthening her connection to the ethereal world and detaching her ties to our Earth, making it a smoother transition from life to the afterlife. Experiencing that surge of benevolent energy was greatly moving, empowering as it stripped my ability to deny my purpose as a healer.

Jo’s family was beyond generous by allowing me to stay in the house for months following her death. For that whole summer, spirit told me to do nothing but work on myself, “Don’t look for a job; money will come. Don’t look for another place to live; it will show up.” This amount of faith required a new, higher level of consciousness. All summer I mostly worked through my fears of my material security. It’s not as though I was on the mainland with many friends offering me their homes or work if needed. I was very secluded on an island and my safety net was my faith. My place of focus and ability to surrender became more and more important as I relinquished the need to have conventional stability. I had to truly believe in the universe to support me without having a clue where or when this source would appear.

In the meantime, I was receiving signs that someone I knew would soon be moving to the island. It turned out to be a woman whom I have known since pre-school, all the way though high-school. Other than one particular day that summer, she hadn’t crossed my mind in years. Out of the blue, my brother texted to tell me she had relocated to the island. Her moving day happened to be that one same day I was feeling drawn towards her. Then for some reason, I started driving to a resort which I never visited. I stopped myself ten minutes into the drive, mostly because I was distracted by a rainbow and started chasing it, but while I was pulled over it hit me where I was driving to and wondered why the hell I was going there. I found out later that night, I had been on my way to the same resort she moved to. Long story short, I received numerous confusing signs about our purpose together. And for whatever reason, she just had to see me at my two most vulnerable and fearful times since I had come to Hawaii. – I needed someone familiar to represent certain relationships with people from my past in order to push me to face my fears. This offered enlightenment into how far I really have come, that I actually have moved on. – I no doubt made an ass of myself, but somehow after I did I felt so much lighter like I had done what I was supposed to do and now the right things were free to manifest. It was a huge test for speaking my truth as I sounded absolutely ridiculous. And while I may have lacked some grace, stumbling my way through the whole uncomfortable situation, I reached a new liberating level of expression which I feel was the purpose of that entirely bemusing experience. Seeing her was a major catalyst for change and I am grateful to her for being that compassionate conduit.

After that whole situation, I suddenly saw myself being homeless and I was actually excited, even looking forward to it. I felt the call to travel the island, just felt as though it’s exactly where I belonged. Now, I was feeling amazing regarding the future. I still didn’t know where my money would come from, but I could feel wealth on it’s way and knew I’d have it when I needed it. I was at peace from that point on. Two days before I had to be out of the house, I was taken to meet a really sweet couple who just so happened to be my home base while I was traveling. We traded spiritual sessions for an occasional couch to crash on, showers and loads of laundry. It was perfect timing. The day before I moved out, my previous boss mentioned how I should look into benefits for unemployment. As it turns out, I was completely eligible and financially set for the next six months. Everything was working out.

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I spent the first couple of nights camping on a cliff with a clear ocean view. I started a short water fast because I was too lazy to bring food up or deal with the bugs that would follow. I wanted to stay longer, but there wasn’t enough shade and I needed to be in a cooler environment. On my second night, I was awoken by a spirit stomping on my stomach while yelling at me, “the park is closed and you need to leave!” It was the middle of the night and he was nuts if he thought I was going to break down my tent and haul all of my stuff down the cliff. And yes, I already know the park is closed as I am the only one in the whole place and the gates don’t open till morning so I couldn’t leave even if I wanted to. I was not a happy camper as he obnoxiously woke me out of a pleasant dream to harass me with this crap. I stated how I wasn’t leaving so he either needed to get over me being there, or leave. He left and I drifted back to my happy place. I found out later how I probably encountered a soul which Hawaiians refer to as Nightmarchers, you can look that one up if interested.

I had no idea where to go after the cliff. I was scared, feeling lost while sobbing in my car. I asked spirit where I presently belonged – I heard the couple’s house my home base). Yet, I was reluctant to listen because I didn’t know how long I was going to be without a place to live, afraid of intruding on their space and wearing out my welcome. I wanted to conserve that option as back-up in case I really needed it later on. After a few more hours of my stubbornness and tears, I finally listened to spirit and it was the best thing I could’ve done. I felt so refreshed the following morning and moved on to another spot.

The next place was a tiny campsite right on the water. It had plenty of trees so I stayed there the rest of the time while I was without a home. It was also conveniently located ten minutes away from my home base. There were many nights where I was alone at the campground. One day, I came back and there was a man talking to himself who camped pretty close to me. I stopped for a second and asked spirit if it was safe for me to stay there. They told me to tune into his energy – I didn’t sense aggression, but I felt a great deal of sadness. Spirit then explains, “yes, it is safe for you to stay here, he’s too sad to assault you. You’re fine, don’t worry.” Well alright, that worked for me. I just called in extra angels and asked them to bring him comfort and healing. This was a monumental moment where it was obvious how many fears I had healed. If I had encountered this situation five years ago, there’s no way I would have stayed that night. I would’ve been emotionally lost in my own fears as well as the rational mindset that it wasn’t safe to be around a strange and clearly unstable man while alone. Now, I felt completely protected as I knew spirit’s guidance wouldn’t be subtle if I were ever in danger.

I spent every night watching the moon migrate across the sky while dancing under the stars, I loved every moment of it. There was this log the waves would crash upon which became my space to watch all the meteors. That is one of my favorite things about the island, there’s always an abundance of shooting stars. One morning, I woke up to a whale splashing it’s tail directly in front of me, connecting with the haven of nature was effortless.

During my pilgrimage, I had been in a contact with Aliel, a woman I’d met as a client. Aliel’s situation was different than what I had worked with before; she was experiencing a spontaneous Kundalini Awakening. I had barely heard of this phenomena, but quickly learned how severe it can be. This was an insane switch for Aliel who wasn’t even aware of the basic tools for spiritual sensitivity. She was cosmically blown open while entirely overwhelmed with her new hyper sensitive state. Aliel was planning on moving off the island in two short months. After I worked on her the second time, it was obvious I wasn’t going to be able to help her enough with how little we were seeing each other. Back at camp, I was starting to tire of sleeping on dirt and began desiring a home again, I had only been living outside for two weeks and was already over it. I knew that meant an opportunity would be coming up since my desires are usually aligned with my truth. I made a request to spirit after seeing Aliel, “if it is in our truth for me to work with Aliel, helping her adjust to her new sensitivity, then please create the perfect situations in perfect timing.” I didn’t tell anyone about my prayer. The next morning, I woke up to a text from Aliel relaying how spirit told her to inform me that space had just opened up in the house she was living at. We both felt it was right for me to move in. Suddenly both of my concerns were resolved, so began a six week journey as a live-in spiritual guide.

Aliel’s rapid transformation required daily healings, readings, and counseling to properly balance her energetic field while keeping her centered in collective reality. She was centered enough where she wasn’t in danger of slipping into a state of psychosis so I wasn’t worried about her, I knew she’d be alright. My purpose was helping her understand her evolution while making the experience as comfortable as possible.

I wasn’t seeking the opportunity to become a guide, the situation simply fell into my lap. I felt challenged, yet more than capable of helping Aliel as I have personally experienced too many similar struggles to count. That valuable position taught me not only to embrace my calling as a healer and mystic, but also as a guide. I had never felt more in my element than when we were working together. I felt the purpose behind all of my readings in high-school, my sessions in my Humboldt healing center and my endless self-work. All of those experiences couldn’t have better prepared me to be her guide. I grew immensely and was very grateful for that temporary role.

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The week of my birthday, December 18, was approaching which was making me feel homesick for my siblings and Humboldt family. Hawaii is a gorgeous laid back lifestyle, but people seem to be so concerned with being respectful that they suppress their expression, I’ve also heard how the Kona side is more uptight than Hilo. Living here has surfaced tremendous appreciation for my time in Humboldt. People are also chill and courteous, but they simply don’t give a damn what anyone else does. Being surrounded by this liberal community gifted me with self-acceptance, free expression, and inner peace, nourishing these invaluable treasures is a practice I’ll always make a priority.

Fortunately, I met two significant soul mates during this time. Maija, a trauma nurse who was vacationing from Sweden, instantly became one of my closest friends. Then there was Kol, an incredible man who had visited Hawaii for many years. Maija was experiencing challenges with her spiritual sensitivity. We worked together to make sure she would be able to harness her clairsentience when at home. She is getting stronger, happier as protecting herself is becoming easier and deciphering which energies are hers is getting more clear. She’s also starting to help others understand their emotions and how their spiritual sensitivities may be the culprit to much of their confusion and inner turmoil.

Kol and I met right after I had taken Maija, swimming with the dolphins. As we were hanging on the beach, smoking some herb, we realized not only were we both from Humboldt, but we also attended Humboldt State University during the same years. I was drawn to him the moment I saw him in a way I had never really experienced before. I always know when I meet important people in my life so I am used to the feeling of sudden family, but a romantic soul mate was new territory. As strong as my feelings were, I knew our purpose was short-term (on the romantic realm); we were not meant to be together in this life. I also clearly felt when it was right to spend time together and when we both needed space. There wasn’t a moment of drama and we were blessed with chemistry, passion, true love, and so much fun. We felt entirely comfortable while reminiscing how we were picking up where we left off from other lives. The whole experience was extremely validating and empowering as I was able to stay so calm and emotionally detached to possible future outcomes. I somehow completely loved him, but was also at peace with the thought of not seeing him again. Kol shared how meeting me gave him hope for another marriage while I expressed my gratitude for being a beautiful example of my future husband; I’m sure our paths will cross many more times throughout this life. Celebrating my birthday with Maija and Kol was purely a gift… exactly the energy I wanted, needed.

The following six months seemed never-ending. I barely saw anyone on the island and I didn’t do anything other than work on myself. Spirit told me that I needed this time of isolation; I was more frustrated than I had felt in a while. I wasn’t depressed, but I was definitely fighting that feeling at times. It took work to shift my perceptions into present gratitude instead of the irritation of being in a long hibernation. I took two significant trips to California which got me through those months of solitude. On the first trip, an old friend’s father passed so I flew back to spend some time with her. I also got to spend valued time with my brother; he’s just the best. Synchronicity favored a visit to my amazing sister who I hadn’t seen in two years. I may not have much contact with my brother or my sister, but I am blessed with very easy, honest, and close relationships with both of them. My siblings give me sublime strength as I can always feel their complete faith and trust in me. Everything I do to heal and follow my heart is for myself, but they are my motivation. I want to live my dreams so that they know it is possible for them as well. The second trip was to my best friends’ wedding. I finally got to party all weekend while spending time with soul family. It was an honor to speak at the ceremony for two of the most important, beautiful people in my life.

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When I returned to Hawaii, I began a seventeen day water fast. I completed a ten day fast three years ago because my mind was flooded with financial fears and I didn’t like who I was at that time. Fasting completely cleared those thoughts and helped me shift my belief system. I have never experienced a mindset that unpleasant again. This time, I was feeling great mentally and physically. However, spirit explained that my consciousness was operating at a higher frequency than my physical body; fasting would quickly clear out all of the old emotions which were still stored in my body (even though I had already worked through such matters consciously). I needed my body and mind to be in harmony and they weren’t at that point. During the fast, I didn’t experience any detox symptoms which was nice and I also rarely felt emotional. Around day ten, the dizziness subsided as my body finally adjusted to my lower blood pressure. I even had more energy to do a few important things instead of just resting. Most of the fast was spent sleeping, practicing yoga, writing, meditating, and making Netflix my bitch. On days 12 – 15, I was in a cute hobbit house off the grid, at a higher elevation. I unfortunately didn’t drink enough water because I wasn’t used to that altitude. As a result, I found myself feeling ill on day 17 so I decided to break the fast instead of trying to recover from mild dehydration without food. The fast definitely shifted my vibration as I could feel energy flowing through my entire body again, whereas it was only moving through my crown chakra before the cleanse.

I was starting to eat again and completely broke; I had never not had money like this before. I was fortunate that the house I lived in always fed everyone, but they seldom had fresh produce. Luckily, there were tons of ripe mangoes in the garden. Those mangoes were a godsend in breaking the fast. Before long, that abundance ended and there was no pure food available… everything was processed and my body was completely detoxed from the fast. I didn’t feel ill from the food, but I also didn’t feel good (I felt better during my fast). My skin was starting to breakout and I really needed things to change.

I had been bitching to spirit for months about my financial security. I was incessantly working on making sure my focus was on abundance instead of my fears. I was exhausted at trying to manifest everything for half a year, feeling quite pissed off that I had been working on it the whole time and now scared that I was about to be homeless in two weeks. I was surrendering and not focusing on anything anymore, so over this shit. The only work I practiced was channeling light to make sure my energy was staying clear. I didn’t think about the future. Anytime I had asked what to do for six months, the answer was always,”wait.” I was often screaming and crying at spirit, something along the lines of, “fuck you guys, this is bullshit!” I always feel clearer and calmer after I vent; I was releasing blocks to my desires. Spirit constantly reminded me to stay out of victim mentality. I wasn’t stuck, I had free will and I could always choose to get a job or move. But instead, I was choosing to listen to my intuition by summoning faith, waiting like I was being guided to do.

Finally, things started shifting less than a week before I had to be out of the house. I asked the same damn question I had been asking for six months. This time however, the answer was different, “call Dawn.” Dawn had been floating around my mind for a year. I knew there was significance with her sometime in the future, but it never felt like the right time. And every time I was told to, “wait,” she would cross the back of my mind very subtly. So, I called Dawn and explained my situation. She told me when she saw me a month ago she had a fleeting thought, “she’s not going to be happy there much longer and she’s going to come live with me.” She expressed how she had been expecting my call and was wondering what was taking me so long. I met up with her for dinner the next day and the following day I was moved in. She just bought a beautiful two bedroom house and had only been living in it for two weeks. It was perfect timing.

I was still screwed financially so I was asking for guidance on how to resolve that mess. Whenever I had previously asked, I always heard that I would eventually have to ask my parents for help. I did not like that answer. In the past, financial assistance always came with power struggles and no one was ever happy with the outcome. I felt ashamed, guilty that I needed help and they always had countless questions regarding my future plans. Such inquiries triggered unnecessary pressure, stress, and feelings of unworthiness. The whole situation always felt controlling and unhealthy even though their hearts were in the right place. I realized during my fast that what I really feared was losing the closer relationships my full independence had allowed me to build with them. However, I also knew that because I was fearing it so much, I was ultimately going to have to ask for help in order to heal those fears. I worked past my pride, feeling confident and worthy and called my parents. I simply stated how I was in a situation where I needed help along with how much money I needed. Their response, “No problem. I’ll send it out today.” There were no questions or conditions. As soon as I got off the phone, I felt waves of light and abundance wash over me. I had just removed whatever financial blocks I was carrying and now prosperous treasures were about to find me. I had been working through my pride and worthiness and my parents were working on accepting detachment from their grown children. Spirit also explained how their minds are now at ease in knowing I will actually ask for help when I truly need it. We all turned over a new leaf.

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When I met with Dawn, she told me about a job opportunity with one of her patients. She had thought of me for the position for a while, but never felt that it was the right time for either of us… until now. As soon as she told me about the situation, I felt as certain about it as I did the moment I heard about Hawaii (I instantly knew I’d be moving to the island). I met with the elderly couple a few days later. They were so sweet and laid back. I knew they were soul family and that we all have a purpose together. It’s a live-in position in a gorgeous gated community with lavish homes (and their lap size pool). They don’t need much help so I would only be working part-time which is exactly what I wanted. I am finally feeling called to begin planting seeds for my spiritual career and this secure situation couldn’t be more perfect for that freedom.

It’s been a very challenging year, but with countless blessings. I feel like a different person as I have never felt this light and liberated. I trust myself more than ever to always know what to do, where to go, and when to be there. Everything I am desiring is ultimately attracted to me and my dreams are only growing as my beliefs become increasingly unlimited. I feel like I’m already living my Heaven on Earth and I know things are essentially only getting better.

Home

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What brought me to the island – Home Sweet Hawaii

02/22/15

“Cancer Should Never Be a Surprise”

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Spirit once told me, “Cancer should never be a surprise.” I was intrigued and longed to understand what was meant by that bold statement. Like nearly all of my posts, the following represents my perspectives from my conversations with spirit.

Cancer shouldn’t be a subtle energy which one day shocks us. It could be an obvious form of negativity which we sense way before it becomes as serious as the infamous, “cancer.” The reason we aren’t aware of poisonous energy flooding our body is because we have slowly suffocated ourselves with low vibratory food, or other chemicals, and buried emotions. Both keep us at a lower frequency which is more compatible to the negative energy of cancer. Because of the higher compatibility within the two energies, cancer is empowered, given the treacherous ability to remain hidden until it’s often too late to heal. When our frequency is at a higher level, we become more sensitive, noticing the slightest shifts within our body. Anyone who has transitioned to a healthier diet understands the annoyance of feeling crappy from food you used to tolerate just fine. However, this is what we should be feeling every time we consume any kind of disharmony. Otherwise, the toxins have the opportunity to build an army.

The more buried our emotions, the more we tend to crave food with a lower frequency. Even without consuming low frequency food, avoiding our emotions is the most harmful energy. If our emotions are stewing beneath the surface then it is like a volcano that is waiting to explode. It may erupt in the form of health issues or we may attract it in other means such as a car accident. Consuming high frequency foods will help our health tremendously, but we still have to honor our emotions and allow them to breathe. Fortunately, high vibratory food aids emotional balance.

Our diet and emotions are powerful influential sources which greatly affects our wellbeing. Being numb is dangerous and leaves us susceptible to masked threats. Luckily, our sensitivity serves as a loyal ally and guide.

– Update –

After my 17 day water fast, I am feeling less vulnerable to low frequency foods. I feel as if my body is only accepting the nutrients while automatically healing toxins. I don’t feel good from low vibratory foods, but I am also not feeling ill anymore. My body feels much stronger and greatly healed. I feel as though we become incredibly sensitive to toxins while we are detoxing, which may take many years, but then our body is much more capable of transmuting toxins into higher frequencies.

– Update 2 –

The healthier my body becomes, meaning, the more my spirit is one with my body, the better I feel from all foods.

09/15/14

Abundance

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In order to happily receive a steady flow of abundance, it is important to acquire a balance of manifesting and surrendering as well as giving and receiving.

The easiest way to create equality with manifesting and surrendering is through gratitude. We manifest abundance by being grateful for what we have or even for that which we desire as if we already have it. We surrender with gratitude because unlike trying to keep a positive mindset, appreciation doesn’t leave room for fear to seep in. The more we live in faith, surrender, instead of fear, the easier it becomes for spirit to intervene, helping us live a happy and fulfilled life. Gratitude alters our perceptions into a prosperous reality which then attracts a personal world of wealth instead of stagnation and scarcity.

Our roles of giver and receiver are also significant. As the receiver, we must accept help with humility, gratitude, and inspiration. Receiving aid with feelings of shame, jealousy, and guilt only leads to blocks and resentments. As the giver, we must do so out of compassion and respect with complete detachment to the outcome of our generosity. Giving out of a state of obligation or just trying to be nice will also manifest resentments. These resentments create barriers in receiving love which then attracts issues with our health, material world, or relationships. With both of these positions, if giving or receiving doesn’t feel right then the exchange simply isn’t in the other’s truth as well. True sacrifice is beneficial for everyone.

A small habit such as tirelessly searching for the cheapest deals sends a message of poverty to the universe. That energy of poverty then attracts financial limits and obstacles. This is because we are telling the universe we are in lack and the universe always reflects our communication with loyalty. Instead of draining our time and energy, we can spend the extra cash with gratitude and the faith that it’ll come back to us… And so it does.

Stress is created from obsessively focusing on the past or future. Peace and security are attained when we live in the present. Appreciating the now removes our fears of the future and alleviates pain from our past. Living in the moment slows down our mind so we can clearly hear our high self’s guidance. This allows spirit to offer us the clarity when it is time to prepare for the future or reflect on our past, to heal.

An exercise to attract abundance:

Focus on a memory where you felt wealthy, even if it’s just receiving your normal paycheck. Now keep that feeling of blissful security and let go of all of the details surrounding the situation (e.g. how you obtained the prosperity/ where it came from).

Simply feeling our desires instead of trying to figure out the specifics gifts our universe the freedom to deliver our dreams in ways better than we could imagine. The incredible doors which suddenly open are options our rational mind may have never seen coming.

07/13/14

Wealth and Sensuality

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Our two energy centers which most strongly impact our physical reality are the Root and Sacral chakras. They are also the sources responsible for our sexuality.

The breakdown:

– How our Root and Sacral chakras create our material reality –

Root

– Our connection to Earth (the physical world)
– Our material security

Sacral

– How we attract wealth (through bliss or misery)
– Our connection to pleasurable sensations; such as:

  • To actually savor the taste of our food
  • To truly feel the cleansing water of a shower
  • To sincerely take in the colors of a sunset

When I am stressed with my living conditions, I know I have work to do on my root. When I am feeling somber and unattractive, I hear my sacral calling for help. Experiences are surfacing which require attention and healing. After I transform that stagnant energy, my security and zest for life returns.

chakras root, sacral

Sacral and Root unbalanced
– We do not enjoy life and lack material security

Sacral balanced
Root unbalanced
– We are doing what we enjoy, but lack material security

Sacral unbalanced
Root balanced
– We acquire material security, but not happily
Sacral and Root balanced
– We obtain material security, happily

When these centers are unbalanced, we can find it difficult to experience pleasure. These challenges are the result of our subconscious aversion to grounding, being present in our body, connecting to Earth. This is especially true for those who hold a history of physical or sexual abuse. As a result, we may attract obstacles to our material wealth.

We always have the power to heal ourselves regardless of our experiences, the task is not generally easy, but it is simple. When we quiet our mind to hear what our body is trying to say, we channel the courage to process and release such energies which block our truth. With that said, there are numerous healing paths and the journey is different for everyone.

05/18/14

Hurdles In Ascension

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Ascension is simply following our heart while aware of the power behind our focus, emotions and psychic senses. Our heart is our objective, higher self. It’s our spirit which loves unconditionally and our ultimate guide in life.

“Change is the only constant.” – Heraclitus

Our ability to shift into a higher consciousness depends on our faith to allow countless change. This can be challenging when society tends to view endings as failures. For example, when terminating a marriage or losing a job, we usually receive responses such as, “I’m sorry, marriages take a lot of work/ the economy is terrible,” instead of, “your time was up there and something better is on it’s way. I’ll think good thoughts for you”. More often than not, we resist our truth by staying in stagnant positions. Situational longevity does not automatically denote happiness or true success.

Ascension requires the remembrance that the most important relationship is with ourselves, the world will only mirror back how we treat ourselves. Any dependency issues serve to reflect how we are incomplete within. Depending on another to feel validated and loved is an emptiness that will never truly be filled until we feel whole while alone. When we are happy within, people who are also whole enter our lives, or known people shift vibrations, to mirror that wholeness back to us. This allows us to truly enjoy one another instead of feeling pressured and obligated, we are able to just be. However, in order to be at this point we have to surrender our fears of life being, “too good to be true”. It is only too good if we believe it is.

By living our truth, we become an example of happiness. People who are unhappy will often go through transformations such as:

“Are you really happy?”

“Screw you for being happy.”

“How are you happy?”

“I want to be happy too!”

Raising our vibration creates many changes in our relationships. We may feel tempted to try to push our loved ones to see things from our perspective, but trying to force our views on others will only create resistance and resentments. The best action is following our truth. We have to trust and respect ourselves so we do not become derailed by sudden conflicts with lovers, family and friends. We have to be okay with times of separation due to our loved ones’ lack of acceptance with our way of life. By following the path of our heart, we understand no one is right or wrong. There is only a difference of perspectives which makes the relationship incompatible for the time being. Taking time apart does not diminish the love we have for one another, it’s respecting and appreciating our connection. Whether the distance lasts for a week or for the rest of our life, it doesn’t change how much we love each other.

– Living in Peaceful Synchronicity –

– Being in the Now through gratitude

– Accepting/embracing life as is (patience in limitations)

– Holding strong boundaries while free of judgments

– Not taking reactions personally

– Surrendering control issues to the faith of your truth

– Flexible manifestation (focusing on desires while open to unseen paths)

– Balanced giving and receiving; manifesting and surrendering

– Forgiving ourselves and having faith in others

02/17/14

Spiritual Overdose

It’s common to lose a part of ourselves when we begin opening to the vast world of spirituality. We end up blocking their own unique personality while trying to become a “better person” or “enlightened being”. While we are off searching for the deeper meaning of life, we often times forget to live. We read many books and attend spiritual gatherings,  however while learning all of this knowledge, we neglect the importance of listening within. Without going within, we do not reunite with wisdom, we are stuck in the logical land of knowledge. Obtaining a great amount of knowledge can often turn overwhelming, making us feel even more stagnant or lost.

Spirit frequently reminds me to lighten up. Whether I’m upset over something stupid like not being able to find my keys or a deeper matter like healing a traumatic event from my past, I am reminded the pain I’m feeling is ridiculous because I’m allowing myself to buy into the illusion of pain. The source of my soul is always at peace and it is my choice in every moment whether I feel that peace or allow my fears to override that pure state of being. While aware of this duality, I choose not to suppress the grief that surfaces, but also laugh at myself in the process. My truth is not to take life seriously and I achieve this by focusing on the humor of how screwed up the human race is.

My personality has always been something along the lines of, “spirit, what the fuck?” It’s how I’ve always communicated with spirit and one of these days it could easily be the heartfelt quote etched into my tombstone. It’s my source to peace and clarity, while holding the intention of self-respect and gratitude. It’s my venting outlet and prayer all in one.

While strongly partaking in the New Age world, I probably wouldn’t be considered a proper professional in the field. I do not feel connected to societal norms of appropriate behaviors so I won’t act that way with my clients. I would rather attract one right person instead of fifty who’s truths are not compatible to mine. I trust the right people will be drawn to me and accept me exactly as I am.  My heart doesn’t guide me to act the way people think I should, it tells me to appreciate my uniqueness. If my entrepreneurial work isn’t solely providing me with all my desires then I simply I belong elsewhere as well.

Obviously, connecting spiritually is different for everyone. For some, their calling may be in a church, the world of nature or a trippy drum circle. Yet for someone else, he may feel most connected while sitting in a movie theater because his life purpose is to be a screenwriter. Some may see his movie theater temple as lacking depth, yet to him, life makes sense in that setting.

What makes you happy? Why does it make you happy? I don’t mean the false sense of happiness which only feeds an obsessive void. What are your dreams? Are they ego-based or guidance from your higher self? What are your perceived strengths and challenges? Honestly answering these questions will reveal your life purpose. We have to surrender our judgments so our fears do not block our clarity, once we know ourselves then our embedded beliefs beyond this world become clearer. We no longer seek meaning as we are now living it.

Spirituality, at least for me, is genuinely expressing ourselves so we connect with the right energies, whether that be people, places or objects, in perfect timing.

Expression to Attract Synchronicity

12/11/13

Love Thy Killer

If you were killed, you would have to remember compassion in order to reunite with your peace. You would see beyond the perceptions of time and space and remember the only real truth is love. You would remember the karmic ties or soul contract between you and your killer. You would remember that you and your killer probably shared reverse roles in other dimensions… the whole, “what goes around comes around” thing. You would remember how you attracted your murder. You would understand how you are in no way to blame yourself for your death. Instead, you would take responsibility by remembering the energies you came into this life to heal and the vibes you fearfully held onto which resulted in this unfortunate event. You would remember that your killer is no less important or benevolent than yourself, that we are ALL one. You would remember that being a victim or being a predator- they’re just labels and those labels are only a boxed description of your actions/experiences; they are not illustrations of your true essence.

We are surrounded by media which daily reiterates the “evil” in the world. We are shown murderers, rapists, child molesters, abusers, terrorists and so on. The intense focus upon such predators makes us feel as though we are somehow lacking environmental safety.  We attempt to “protect” society by adding more laws, harsher punishments, and less general freedom.  – There will always be “evil” in the universe as duality exists for a reason. – However, instead of fearing it, we can choose to reconnect with our true selves (to raise our consciousness) so that we do not attract undesired circumstances. Our boundless minds and compassionate hearts will never lead us astray as we become our own walking safe haven.

To remember peace, we must love the ones we are supposed to hate the most. These are the people who have immensely hurt us and our loved ones. We must love the killers of our sacred sexuality, heartfelt dreams, and creative sanctuary. In loving our nightmares, we become empowered by remembering no one can ever make us feel a certain way (or kill a part of us) unless we allow it. This empowerment may very well include zero communication between you and your killer. Through self-respect and self-love, you set the boundaries that allow you to love the world unconditionally.

11/17/13

Home Sweet Hawaii

Aloha!

welcome flowersTwenty-thirteen began with a determined universe who scooped me up from cozy Humboldt and landed me in my little hometown of Grass Valley. For familial and spiritual reasons, I was called to spend some months in an area where I never thought I’d share a future. At that time, I felt my energy was needed elsewhere so I did not pursue my spiritual work. I instead got a job I had no passion for.  It didn’t take me long to realize I was beginning to lose my happiness. As glad as I was to be around loved ones, my professional life was obviously lacking joy and purpose. I soon became aware that somewhere along the line I had stopped speaking my truth. My voice had shut down as the majority of the towns I was around did not share a similar metaphysical mindset. When enlightened of this block, I cut my cords of fear and followed the path of my throat chakra.  I was then removed from dissatisfying work and whenever I got a new job it was always better than the last.  I had never been fired before, but I was beginning to get the hang of it. The universe kindly evacuated me every time I started to feel as though I did not belong in a situation.

I started a practice of abundance visualizations by picturing my sacral chakra (or as I like to call it, the chakra of luxury) strongly flowing as well as lighted money pouring down on me. I focused on feeling pure gratitude and being in love with my job (whatever that would be). I even daydreamed of an opportunity that would take me to an exotic location; someplace where I could freely write with a spectacular view of the ocean.

Two months ago, I began to feel a new job coming my way. Spirit told me not to search for it, “the opportunity will come from Bonnie, and looking for it would be a waste of your time and energy”. I listened to their advice and had faith in a wondrous outcome. Sure enough, Bonnie called me a month later with my current dream job as a live-in caregiver for a wonderful family… in Hawaii. Now I find myself blessed with long lost family, nature sprites, and windfalls of prosperity.

Wonder what my dreams will surprise me with next…

Mahalo Spirit!

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My view from Home

 

08/18/13

Spirit & Parenting

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Children enter this world with an already present personality accompanied by their own life purpose. A parent’s mission is not to guard their child from harmful energies. Rather, their calling is to protect their child from his/her ego. The world can never harm us unless we hold the slightest belief that it can. This is a different perspective than seeing ourselves as invincible. We understand the bigger picture that our greatest strength lies in our sensitivity and vulnerability in feeling the universe. Being connected emotionally and intuitively is crucial in our protection. Instead of teaching children to fear strangers or view “predators” as monsters, we should help them remember how to trust themselves through self-empowerment.

Your child’s truth may not be in sync with societal norms. It’s understandable to get caught up in the words “right” and “wrong”, but it’s important to look past those limitations by learning not to care what the world thinks. Also, try to avoid getting lost in your own experiences. While they are a valuable tool, your past does not determine your child’s future. For example, your teenage daughter may want to leave the house while closely resembling the stereotypical streetwalker. It is easy to say her outfit is inappropriate, but do yourself and your child a favor and go deeper. Center yourself so that you can clearly hear your daughter’s higher self. Is she wearing those clothes because of low self-esteem and premature curiosity (ego), or is she doing so because she is connected to her higher self while freely expressing her style and sexuality? If it’s ego then don’t hesitate on setting those boundaries. Yet if it’s her truth, then surrender your fears and support her on her path. Just because you may have been molested in your youth that does not mean your child is going to attract the same experiences. Living our truth naturally protects us from unhealthy circumstances.

The purpose of parenting is to be connected to your higher self so you are an example of living your truth. By being that model, your children can then recognize the parts of you which are in line with their own truth. You are nurturing their connection to their higher self and as a result providing them the freedom to be their authentic self. As challenging as it may be, try not to push your values or beliefs on your kids. The best action you can take is simply being.

04/5/13

Reincarnation, Time and Space

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If someone would have told me years ago I’d be writing about the illusion of time, I would have told them they were a crappy psychic. I am sincerely annoyed by in-depth topics like that of time and space as I don’t have the patience for that kind of intellectual processing. My lack of passion for critical thinking is exactly why I choose not to think on these subjects. On the other hand, I choose to listen when Spirit talks. What I write is what I hear.

Instead of viewing reincarnation as past, present and future, think of it as a multidimensional moment. The life we are living is simply the one we are the most conscious of. Just as our body contains molecules to create our physical body, our soul is composed of infinite energies to manifest various entities of ourselves. All of our existences are a part of who we are as other realities reside in our DNA.

Soul Evolution is like a horseshoe. At one end we are brand new to existence, so we emanate only love. The same thing goes for the opposite end except we have experienced and befriended our ego. The middle of the horseshoe is where we have the worst relationship with our ego. This is where apathetic individuals such as serial killers fall on the evolution spectrum. Again, the horseshoe does not represent time as we perceive time to be. Time is simply another word for alternate realities. Even a memory from our childhood is now energy from another reality.

Compassion is remembering we are all one, the predators in the world are a part of ourselves. We may perceive them to be in the middle of the horseshoe in this reality, but elsewhere they are on either sides and everywhere in-between, just like us.

To hold strong boundaries formed of compassion since we are everyone and they are us.

01/28/13

“Fuck It”, Spirit’s Guilty Pleasure

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Whether we mentally or verbally rehearse the infamous, “fuck it” we are choosing to release a struggle we no longer accept. Spirit hears our subconscious call and rushes to our aid. Despite their superhero complex, spirit cannot ease our burdens unless we give them permission to help.

So the next time you feel the need to channel a magical “fuck it”, just remember to add, “spirit, deal with this”. Then, buy some pop rocks, swing on a swing and momentarily forget all your problems. In other words, do something to be a kid, play and surrender. And when spirit harmonizes your life…

Thank them! And so everyone is Happy.

01/19/13

Building Faith

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We’ve all heard the reputable yet seemingly tired advice, “have faith,” followed by our own frustrations and skeptical thoughts. Faith is a form of trust and it’s no secret trust can take a while to attain. Choosing a mindset of faith is not only a belief, but a way of life. While having trust in the faith of our choice, we live fearlessly as a true free spirit.

Think of when a new friend or romantic partner enters your life you get to know one another to conclude whether or not you feel they are trustworth, you pay attention to their words and actions to determine their loyalty. If you feel like it, give your spirit a similar opportunity to prove itself.

Since spirit cannot interfere with our free will, we must ask for help to receive assistance. To begin building faith it is helpful to ask for little signs so we are less likely to doubt our desired outcome. The more we are able to release our fears, the easier it is for spirit to intervene. Once we start to experience little moments of synchronicity, we begin to open our mind to options we would have otherwise been closed to. This is because experiencing serendipity increases our faith, so we feel encouraged and hopeful while asking for help with greater concerns. Eventually, we come to realize there is no need for struggling unless we forget there is no need. There will always be challenges, but struggling occurs when we encounter too much resistance in our endeavors.

Spirit does not judge and loves everyone unconditionally. It doesn’t matter what so-called hellish acts we partake in, spirit will never turn it’s back on us. The only acts of betrayal we should be conscious of are limitations from our ego which manipulate us into believing we are unworthy of love and support.

09/17/12

Auric Protection

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Auric (Spiritual/Psychic) Protection:
Allowing ourselves to be surrounded by spirit’s unconditional love so we do not attract unwanted energies. Self-love will also protect us from negative occurrences.

Our sensitivity level is irrelevant as it is important for everyone to protect themselves from lower energies. It becomes of greater importance when we allow ourselves to be open to energies more than usual. Some examples of heightened vulnerability include meditation as well as drug use.

Our intuition becomes much clearer when we are spiritually protected, it is easier to recognize inner knowledge when we do not have negative energy weighing us down. With this new clarity, any feelings of uncertainty and confusion will decrease considerably.

Some everyday choices which increase auric protection:

  • Surrendering worries and doubts to Spirit instead of dwelling on them
  • Focusing on self-love instead of delusional flaws
  • Choosing faith over fear

A common visualization for protection:
Visualize a cocoon of white light surrounding your entire body. Sometimes it’s helpful to visualize the light becoming thicker and thicker until the outside world reveals a foggy appearance. It’s also beneficial to ask for help from whomever/ whatever you may believe in. Using your imagination to connect with a method that feels true to you is highly recommended. Practice protecting yourself as often as it crosses your mind, it will only help.